Larry Flynt Is Still Alive and Hellbent on Destroying Our Godly Nation
A few short weeks ago our dear Godly Christian Brother in Christ, Rev. Jerry Falwell flew away to heaven to meet up with Jesus. While we rejoice in the fact that Pastor Falwell is in Glory with The Lord, and certainly up there in heaven helping The Lord get ready for the Rapture and loading fireballs of burning sulfur into the heavenly rocket launchers for the final battle that is to come with the godless heathens that infect this planet, one has to wonder why The Lord decided to bring Pastor Jerry back home before he flings Larry Flynt into the hottest regions of hell? Not that I'm questioning The Lord's timing on this, but, as a Godly Christian Republican, I'd rather have Pastor Falwell back here with us and Larry Flynt twirling around on a rotisserie in hell instead.
I've spoken with The Lord today, and he certainly does understand my feelings on this, even if he won't give me an explanation. Especially since, on His Holy Day, Sunday, that vile smut peddler, Larry Flynt made an announcement about his million dollar bounty for sinners who want to come forward with ungodly and false accusations of "sexual improprieties" with our Godly leaders. Yes, I said, GODLY leaders, because I guarantee you, Smut Peddler Flynt is NOT looking for DEMONcrats to skin alive. He's looking for trumped up false charges on our GODLY REPUBLICAN leaders just like the last time he pulled this stunt in 1998 after Klinton had turned the Oval Office into a brothel. On a SUNDAY, of all days for him to flap his trap while rolling around on Lord knows what kind of drugs in that solid gold wheelchair paid for by the American taxpayer! Friends, it's this kind of brazen sinning that makes my head explode!
Friends, if this doesn't raise a bout of Godly, Righteous Anger up through your bowels, then you aren't saved!!!!!!! Period!!!!!!!!
We've been thinking about what we could do here at God Hates XXX Ministries to counteract the devil's army over at the Hustler empire of feculence. Larry Flynt's million dollars should be worth NOTHING in this Godly Nation!
What if Larry Flynt suddenly had no harlots? What if he rolled into his "office" (if you can call it that) one day and there were no harlots there to greet him? Where would he get his precious million dollars to pay some jezebel to make up a story about the Godly Christian Republicans? He'd be out of business folks!
I believe the Godly Solution to Larry Flynt is to steal all of his harlots and deport them. Actually, the Godly Solution to Larry Flynt would be a public stoning, but since the LIEbrals won't let us do that, the next best thing would be a covert operation to steal all of his harlots. It would be an easy, 1,2,3 operation! We just stand outside his door and grab them right before they can walk into the building, hogtie them, and throw them into flatbed trucks, rent a cargo jet and load 'em up in there and ship them off to the towelheads. In fact, I'm willing to bet the camel jockeys would even pay for the gas and let us use one of their planes to get their hands on some sinful harlots to punish and dress in burqas, praise God! As repugnant to The Lord as the mooslims are, they are good for Godly missions such as this. Larry would never get his harlots back and we won't have to worry about him abusing the taxpayers money and flapping his trap anymore! Amen??!!!
